It's Sunday night and all is quiet, more or less, since the tinnitus doesn't know how to be quiet. Getting a bit nervous, as well as excited, about activation day. It is in four days and I just hope it goes well. I know there is a 1% chance the implant can fail, so that is always at the back of my mind. Prepare for the worst, but hope for the best. That is my motto in life, and always has been.
I wish I had more than three days after activation to adjust before going back to work, but that is all I could manage to take just before Christmas. Being in retail, it's hard to take off time around any holiday.
Bob and I got to babysit our granddaughter, Gabrielle, today and we had such fun. She is 15 months old and so smart already. I love watching her, as you can almost see her mind working to figure out a problem or find a way to do something. She is already saying "diaper" when it needs to be changed and can figure out how to open the screen door, or put the lid on a jar correctly. She is also a very happy child and loves to talk to my cats. Her vocabulary is increasing and I just hope I will be able to hear it all as she grows. She doesn't mind me being deaf, as she has never really known any different. She is just a joy, pure and simple.
I do have an observation, one gained by my journey into deafness. Hearing people have more tolerance and understanding of deaf people than they do the hard of hearing. I suppose that is due to misinformation. It seems that once you mention the word deaf, hearing people just get it. Mention hard of hearing, and they lose the translation. I know that being hard of hearing takes on many forms, and that is the problem. In my case, I can clearly hear environmental sounds like a siren, horn honking, paper tearing, but can't understand speech, even though I hear it. Hearing people get so frustrated by that, and I can't help it. It just is what it is.